


Farming Mindbenders With Cayde-6

by momomelo



Category: Destiny (Video Games)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blood, Blood and Violence, Combat, Comedy, Fluff, Gen, Gunplay, They're Having Fun, bring back sparrow racing please, does scorn meat even taste good?, just the guardian and cayde shooting up stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:20:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,833
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23441572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momomelo/pseuds/momomelo
Summary: Cayde-6 and The Guardian tear through the Hollowed Lair, farming to get that god roll Mindbender's Ambition. Why? Cayde has his reasons.
Relationships: Cayde-6/Female Guardian (Destiny)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 14





	Farming Mindbenders With Cayde-6

**Author's Note:**

  * For [µ's clan in Destiny 2](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=%C2%B5%27s+clan+in+Destiny+2).



> The events of this take place after the Prison of Elders Breakout in an AU where neither of you were sent on the opening mission of Forsaken.
> 
> This fic is a gift to my clanmates in µ's who gruesomely stuck with me all last week farming for the Mindbenders Ambition godroll for hours **every single night**.

"Alright Guardian, today's going to be a long day for us. The Spider has some intel that the Fanatic's been squashing up some of his Fallen and spreading the Scorn's reach into Thieves Landing. Now normally we don't touch The Tangled Shore, but Zavala has taken special interest in gaining some extra favor from The Spider. You know, to set up a small guardian camp to keep an eye on Uldren after his breakout or something."

"He hasn't made any serious moves yet but it's very important that we have this give and take with The Spider and stop the Fanatic so he can reinforce his part of the Tangled Shore and- ah who am I kidding you know the drill-“ 

Vaulting into his ship with enthusiasm, Cayde flicks on all his thrusters.

“LETS GO FARMING! WOO!"

* * *

"Ok so here's the plan, we swivel through the lawless Fallen, enter the Quitter's Well, do a sick jump across the cliff gap, make our daring run though the tens of hundreds of Raiders, Stalkers, Screebs, and make our way all the way towards the first hydraulic plate by sparrow. Then we shoot up some Scorn in the process, make a straight bolt to the Fanatic's chamber on foot, bada bing, bada boom, put a bullet in his head, collect our loot and call it a day. Kapiche?" 

A cold gust of wind blew into the Spider's Hideout as Cayde presented his plan drawn like cartoonish diagram in the sand to the Guardian, fishing for a reaction. 

The Spider scoffed- "Hergh, and to think that we lost the Traveler to a group of _things_ like you."

"Alright, Alright Ms. strong and silent type eh? I get it, I ain't quite the artist. No worries Spider, this mission will be do and done, you get your land back for awhile, we get our loot, all's good right?"

Nodding to the Guardian Cayde summoned his sparrow- "I'll race you there!"

Cayde hopped onto his sparrow and soon so did The Guardian. The two bolted out of The Spider's hideout, swerving through the first wave of Fallen before entering the caves. Approaching the cliffside, Cayde purposefully accelerated his sparrow and preformed a graceful barrel roll over the gap, landing smoothly on the other side. 

"Used to be a sparrow racing champion myself ya know. Cayde-3, yeah, that was a wild life. Or was it Cayde-4? Hmm can't remember... I'll have to ask Banshee about that one." 

The two guardians pushed through the initial wave of Scorn in the cavern, grazing past the bolts of void energy whizzing past them left and right. 

"Hey Guardian, check this one out!"

Cayde signals to the Guardian, accelerating his sparrow again, followed by a loud _**THUNK**_. A Screeb latched onto the hood of his sparrow and opened it’s mouth, hissing at Cayde.

"Now if I just-" 

Cayde slammed pedal one last time into his sparrow before ejecting out, smoothly triple jumping onto the cliff-side above. 

The Screeb began to detonate on the hood of the sparrow as it majestically flew towards an unsuspecting Scorn Chieftain.

"And a one, and a two and a OOOH THERE SHE GOES!"

The Guardian watched, as Cayde gestures finger guns at the blue mess of blood splattered across the inner caves.

Cayde chuckles- "I present, Chieftain a la Screeb! Did you see the look on his face? Never saw it coming. Zavala would never let me get away with that!"

* * *

The two Hunters approach the first room with a gigantic hydraulic plate sitting in the middle. Clearing the room of the few guards, Cayde hops onto the mechanism.

Projecting his ghost, "Now if intel serves right, if we just stand on this plate-"

 _ ***BANG BANG***_ *

Smoke fumed from Cayde's signature Ace of Spades following by the distant clicks of two rifles falling to the ground. The two Raiders hiding behind cover dropped dead to the platform below- exploding in a majestic Firefly explosion.

"Can't a man just read in peace? I swear these Scorn have _no_ manners."

"Alright, and the plate's pushed all the way down, through this big oval door should be another room with two more plates-"

**_*THUNK*_ **

A large Fallen tank dropped straight into the path between the two hunters and their exit.

"Well, this wasn't in the intel briefing."

The two immediately took cover as the Fallen tank began to spit a volley of flames in their surrounding area. 

"Got any ideas?" Cayde asks, shooting the waves of incoming Scorn, reloading, triggering his Memento Mori.

The Guardian nods, as the renaming few Scorn mobs drop by her feet, converting their Remnants into Noble Rounds into her Lumina.

Cayde smirks, "Ahh, I like your style of thinking!"

The Guardian raises her gun at Cayde as he begins to sprint towards the tank, shooting a Noble Round into Cayde's chest. The Tank raises its main cannon, taking aim at the approaching Hunter. 

**_*FWOOMP*_**

The tank fires it's cannon with, leaving a large explosion and smoke. The Guardian panics, and blind fires remaining Noble Rounds into the smoke, hoping that Cayde wasn't hit by the charged shell. 

"I'M OK!" Cayde yells distantly through the dissipating smoke. 

Cayde stylishly finishing his dodge, aggressively slides under the tank, loading six buffed shots of the combined Memento Mori and Blessing of the Sky into the tank's six legs. With a crackling sound of the machine breaking down, the tank began to expose an orange engine block to prevent overheating- it’s weak spot. Cayde jumped into the air and raised his Hand Cannon high into the sky. A thunderous _CLAP_ echoed across the room as you see Cayde's Hand Cannon turn to a brilliant gold overflowing with solar energy. Soon after followed three loud bangs, unloading all three rounds straight into the Tank’s engine.

"And... Ten seconds, on the dot" he says as the Noble Round buff dissipates off his Ace of Spades. The tank behind him explodes in a majestic fiery explosion sending bits and pieces of the tank scattered across to the other side of the room.

"Hey, hey stop judging me like that will ya? A bit extra? Sure. But that was cool as all hell wasn't it?" He laughs.”

"You know, we make a good team you and I- just two Hunters, covered in Scorn blood, blowing things up... You know, a normal Monday!"

As the two guardians walk through the cave system eliminating the few remaining Scorn, Cayde opens up some casual conversation. 

"Ok, maybe I'm a teensy bit salty after my L in the Crucible last week. Fine, fine, very salty, you can stop rubbing that in, all the Hunters have been talking about it."

"Look, you know Zavala isn't normally the close quarters sort of Titan right? You've seen him fight in the Red War, just kinda- you know plinks down his enemies with his rifle at a distance. Meanwhile Shaxx and Saint just go straight in, oh man once they’re in your face _those_ are some real scary Titans."

"But this onneeee time I turned a corner and thought I caught him off-guard, and whipped out my shotgun? Well, turns out, a Toil and Trouble beats a Wishbringer huh."

"Now normally there's no way I lose a CQC fight to Zavala but he had a Threat Detector on, and he just saw me coming and pulled out that boomstick faster than I could even say _COWABUNGA_. Do guardians even still say that in this day? No? Man, I miss the Golden Age."

"So you know, I figured if the Crucible right now is about whoever can pull their shotgun out the faster I figured hey, why not grab that hot new quickdraw shotgun that all the Crucible fiending guardians have been running around with. You know, I gotta settle the score and all. I was top ranked back in Cayde-5! I can't let that score die out to Zavala out of all people."

* * *

The Hunters approached a room with two more gigantic hydraulic plates. Cayde silently gestures to The Guardian to take the right plate while he takes the left. With a sharp crack of a Trophy Hunter round tearing through a patrolling Raider’s head, the Scorn in the room panic and begin to blind-fire in the direction of the shot.

In the distance Cayde cheers "Nice shot buddy!" as the Scorn soon start to suppress Cayde, who was first to hop onto the hydraulic plate.

A wave of Scorn reinforcements spawn in before they could celebrate, overwhelming the two guardians in a volley of void fire. Two Raiders in the distance take aim and land two hard hitting shots into Cayde’s chest, ringing the sound of a broken shield.

"Oof- A little help here?"

Immediately the Lumina wielding Hunter shoots three rounds across the room to the other hydraulic plate. The orbs make a sharp 90 degree turn and dip down to Cayde, repairing his shield to full instantly.

"Man, that thing is _AWESOME!_ And they say that Hunters can't support their fireteam! You gotta let me play around with that later" replied Cayde, full of vigor, dodging bullets until returning the favor to the two Raiders in the distance.

Cayde’s chatter was cut short as loud and hollow footsteps echoed across the room. Both Hunters looked across the room, as a blue monstrosity stomped slowly over through the gate, shaking the ground underneath them.

"Man, intel's really off today ain't it? They didn't say anything about an Abomination."

In an instant, The Guardian sprinted towards the Abomination, drawing her sword as Cayde began dancing with the mobs of Scorn being called in as reinforcements. The Guardian took a heavy swing to the Abomination's belly, stunning it for a moment before it aggressively stomped, causing inertia that would otherwise send The Guardian flying across the room. However, the sword wielding Hunter slashed her powered sword back at the Abomination, negating the knock-back acceleration caused by the stomp and landed back at the foe’s feet with little damage taken. The Guardian continued to dance around the Abomination in slashes as it attempted to stomp again. The Hunter slyly dodged though the Abomination's legs, and cut upwards with a heavy slash, almost splitting the Abomination in two. Cayde slid towards the two pulling out his Wishbringer and plowing all seven rounds of the shotgun into the Abomination’s body, delivering the final blow and causing it to splatter into a messy pile a flesh and organs. 

"Well, would you look at that. That's some of the finest minced Scorn I've ever seen. The Drifter hasn't said anything about how Scorn meat tastes has he? I wonder if that's up his palette" Cayde chuckled.

The two guardians walk out of the room, chatting while covered in Scorn blood. 

"Oh yeah, your question before. Why not go in with a Toil and Trouble myself you say? Partner, you have it all wrong, you know my kinetic slot is Ace or nothing. Suuure the other hunters may be raving about that hot new Hand Cannon the Drifter has been handing out- It's shiny and shoots well, and is light enough to run a bit faster, but if it's kinetic, it's all about Ace baby, name a more iconic duo. Cayde-6 and the Ace of Spaces, I don't put that down for nothing."

* * *

The two Hunters casually sneaked past the bridge and enter the Hollowed Lair, where the Fanatic, Fikrul stood freshly resurrected.

"YOU SHALL DIE FOR THE LAS-"

"Yeah yeah, die for the last time, y'know you ought to come up with some new lines, this ain’t your first rodeo."

Cayde immediately casts his golden gun and points it at the Fanatic's head. "Anyways, let's make this one quick, I have things to do."

Cayde struck three shots into the Fanatic's head, the former two dealing massive damage to the Fanatic, but the third barely scratching him as if he were immune to it.

"Man, today really isn't my day is it?"

Enraged, the Fanatic, struck down his staff to the ground causing a field of arc energy to appear underneath the two. Both Hunters gracefully dodged out of the circle and began to open fire with their Hand Cannons with little to no effect. The Fanatic retreated behind a barrier to rest and summoned a hoard of Scorn at the guardians.

"Oh lord that's a lot of Scorn. You wouldn't happen to have a Machine Gun on you by chance would you?"

The Guardian looked at Cayde and just smiled. Jumping high twice into the air, she materialized a bow out of void energy and cast Shadowshot right into the center of the arena, tethering all the Scorn to the powerful purple disco-ball. 

Cayde spun his Ace of Spades and landed a single precision shot into one Scorn Stalker, causing a magnificent explosion of Firefly triggers chaining across all the incoming enemies, generating ten-twenty Orbs of Light.

“Orpheus Rigs? Niiiiice.”

The Fanatic wasn’t amused. He warped out of his hiding hole even more enraged than before. Spawning in waves of Scorn, he raised his staff into the air with his two hands, turning the entire arena into a blinding white.

Suddenly, the two Hunters were floating in the air, bound by an arc tether, they drifted closer to their foe. The Fanatic roared "I will pay any price... to be there when you die!", as he began to take heavy hitting shots into The Guardian. 

"Oh no, not on my watch."

Cayde awkwardly struggled in the tether, grabbing his holstered Wendigo-GL3 hidden underneath his cape and unloaded three hard-hitting light powered rounds from the grenade launcher into the Fanatic's chest. The Fanatic, staggered back, dropping his two captives out from his bind.

"Let's pretend you didn't see that. Zavala won't be too happy to know that I was uh- out borrowing some of his experimental wares."

The two guardians repeated this cycle, casting Golden Gun to send the Fanatic back immediately into his barrier while generating new Orbs of Light with The Guardian’s Shadowshot.

"Sister, I like your style, we work like a machine!"

Tethered for the final time and out of ammo on their power weapons, the two Hunters frantically pelted the Fanatic with their Hand Cannons until his arc shield exploded, causing them both to be dropped to the ground, free from the Fanatic's grasp. With a sliver of health left on their foe, the two nodded at each other. The Guardian hurled a Snare Bomb at the Fanatic’s face, disorienting him while Cayde jumped high three times into the air. Cayde took what seemed like an eternity, carefully and methodologically taking aim, hurling his weighted knife at the Fanatic, causing a beautiful hit right into the center of his skull, knocking him down for good.

"Hey, hey, Guardian, get over here quick, the Hunters on Travitter will love this" he says as he positions his ghost to take a selfie of the two and the Fanatic with a weighted knife lodged into his skull like a unicorn.

"Aaaaaand sent!"

* * *

As the dust settles and the arc on the ground dissipates, the Fanatic's corpse fades into the dark ether. A spark of light shines overhead, dropping a chest from the top of the room indicating their bountiful reward for slaying their foe, Fikrul the Fanatic was complete.

"Hey Guardian, look! Rifled Barrel, Accurized Rounds, Quickdraw and… Pulse Monitor. It ain't the perfect Mindbender’s Ambition but it'll still pack a hell of a punch in the Crucible. This is pretty up there, I think this will out do Zavala's Toil and Trouble with no issue. How about you, anything good?"

The Guardian shakes her head, empty handed, save for a blue engram. Pitying The Guardian, Cayde tosses his purple engram to his Hunter friend.

"You know what partner, this one's for you. Don't worry about it, go ahead and take it. I think you'll have more fun with it than I’ll ever have."

"I can't wait to see the look on Zavala's face when he sees my protege _clowning_ on his shotgun game. By the way, between you and me, I have a couple thousand glimmer on you so uh- try not to lose, ok? It’ll make us some big bucks. Who wouldn’t put their money on Zavala?"

Cayde chuckles- "I'll see you later Guardian, I have a Trials match to catch. This squad of Hunters wants me to run flawless with them. Osiris sure isn't going to be happy to see what this fireteam of knife flinging Hunters is going to do to his brand-new arena."

Cayde walks off towards his ship, juggling his weighted knife between his fingers- and subsequently fumbling it to the ground. He turns around and points at the Guardian.

"You didn't see that, right?"

The Guardian chuckles to herself as she watches Cayde fly off, knowing full well that this is just how their Hunter Vanguard is, a bit of a clown, but always a good time to roll with.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm actually a Warlock ._.
> 
> This fic was inspired from how much fun Cayde was having while running through the Prison of Elders.
> 
> I probably have PTSD from running The Hollowed Lair over 60 times in a week.  
> My farming loadout included a lot of Lumina (MW) usage so excuse the incredibly specific description of how the Lumina works.  
> My best roll was:Rifled Barrel, Accurized Rounds, Pulse Monitor, Quick Draw, Range MW
> 
> I want to give a big **special** fuck you to pulse monitor.


End file.
